New York City based indie-rock band Rookie Mistake explores growing pains and heartbreak in their latest EP "I Will Not Die In Upstate New York"
photo by @mattgfrompc via @rookiemistakeny
Imagine sitting around a campfire on a cool summer night, sharing stories with friends, or relaxing on a couch in your friend’s garage. There is something hopeful and joyous about being surrounded by friends, but also something painful as you realize time seems to be slipping away, and these moments grow fewer and fewer. Somehow, in just five songs, Rookie Mistake captures these feelings and more. Through nostalgic lyrics, intimate vocals, and cathartic instrumentals, Rookie Mistake explores nostalgia in their EP ‘I Will Not Die In Upstate New York’.
What starts as a more soothing and folksy title track builds to a nostalgic combination of raw vocals, clashing instrumentals, and soft backing vocals. “I Will Not Die In Upstate New York” is at first a meditation on heartbreak and depression, but then transitions to a somewhat desperate and adamant plea before reaching acceptance. As the instrumentals build in the first half of the song, and the balanced blend of dreamy backing vocals and more intense lead vocals grow more passionate, the song shifts gears and is more upbeat with stripped instrumentals that reflect the lyrics: “Because I was pretty sure I loved you/But I didn’t know what to say/I was pretty sure I loved you/And I begged you to stay/I will not die here but for now I’ll have to stay/Oh I will not die here but for now I’ll have to stay.” The repetition and slight variations of the lyric “I will not die here but for now I’ll have to stay” give the song structure, and with each variation, the vocals grow more intense and determined. What at first seems to be a bleak ballad about missed opportunities and longing for a better life becomes more hopeful as there is an acceptance of the here and now, but a reinvigorated dedication to living life to the fullest.
In “Fortune Cookie,” Rookie Mistake contrasts the sad lyrics and haunting vocals with more upbeat and angry instrumentals that reflect the mixed emotions one experiences during heartbreak: “Courtney come over I've got something to say to you/I’m no longer sober and I have been thinking it through/Tell me how I'm supposed to feel/When every word I say isn't real/And are you still fighting with your dad?/And saying things that you shouldn't have/But don't you come around and tell me I'm getting older/Oh won't you just cry about it and tell me everything's alright.” The anger in the lyrics grows more and more palpable as the song continues and the instrumentals grow more intense. The electrifying clash of drums and guitar is balanced, but Rookie Mistake is not afraid of losing some control. With each strum of the guitar and bang of the drum there is a sense of frustration and letting go as the build up of emotions finally experience a cathartic release. The EP as a whole feels like a passionate release of bottled up emotions, both good and bad, but “Fortune Cookie” hits the nail on the head with the song’s controlled yet deliciously chaotic structure and grungy sound.
“Trampoline” is more rugged and the instrumentals are particularly nostalgic, like something out of a coming-of-age film where the tormented protagonist leaves their small home town for the first time to chase their dreams in the big city. More out of breath vocals complement the faster rhythm and the repetition of the line “I can’t wait for you.” Again, a building of instrumentals in the bridge creates a nice structure to the song and ends in a slightly more laid back, but still robust burst of instrumentals and energy before concluding. The song is a confrontation of head and heart as the lyrics debate remaining with or leaving a relationship. Just as the song’s title suggests, relationships, no matter how joyful and fulfilling they can be, come with challenges and ups and downs, and require flexibility.
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A slower, more dream-like track, “Famous” features clear and endearing vocals with wispy backing vocals, and calls back to the opening track with folksy and stretched-out instrumentals. Rookie Mistake once again balances more delicate vocals and instrumentals with a sudden clash of instrumentals. When the vocals grow louder and more uninhibited, the accompanying instrumentals reflect those same frustrations and anxieties. Thematically similar to other songs off the EP, “Famous” is a rumination on facing reality and wanting something different from your partner in a relationship. The song catalogs when different ideas and dreams come to a head, and there must finally be a confrontation. The release of vocals and instrumentals at the end somehow feels more necessary and emotional than others on the EP, as if the other tracks have been building to this one specifically.
To conclude I Will Not Die In Upstate New York, Rookie Mistake returns to their roots with “I Love It Here,” a more pared back track with stripped vocals and instrumentals. The sound is very intimate, as if someone is singing just inches away from you. A rustic guitar is the main instrument played throughout the song, accompanied by passionate vocals that echo the passion displayed throughout the EP. As the song comes to an end, you are left with a mix of uncertainty and hope because the EP effortlessly balances those emotions through each track’s vocals, instrumentals, and lyrics.